Confessions of a Pushover: The Grand Speech

Since I have moved  to Virginia, I have watched an embarrassing amount of television. Writing this makes me feel somewhat ashamed, but not enough to run out and cancel my Netflix subscription. As I have devoured one series after another, I have realized that most shows have either an episode or a series of episodes that culminate in a character standing up to a group of people, either their peers or family, and they have a grand speech in which they assert their position and basically tell everyone else to stuff it if they don't like it. If you watch Grey's Anatomy this happens in pretty much every episode.
 

I find the idea of making a grandiose, well-worded speech that befuddles my audience completely fascinating because this has never happened to me and I honestly wonder if such a thing exists in real life or if it is more like, a unicorn. Something fantastic you see on TV but somehow, it missed the ark.

 

In order to provide you with some unnecessary background to my curiosity I submit Exhibit A:
 

Hint: I'm the one on the right. That track suit was awesome for cave spelunking, terrible for sneaking up on people.

I had an awkward phase. Okay it was like an awkward decade. Some might argue that the awkwardness hasn't disappeared at all. Looking like this doesn't really lend well to confidence. I was an awkward, middle child, squished very tightly between to boisterous and opinionated sisters. Is being a pushover a learned behavior, or was I born this way? **Begin 30 second Lady Gaga Dance** My whole life, as far back as kindergarten, all I can remember is wanting to make people happy. However, making people happy was only a byproduct of not wanting to be left out by other people. I had an incessant need to feel included.
 

Happy middle child stuck between the bossy older and younger siblings

Fast forward 20-something years and I find the same desire to please everyone still exists. I won't send food back because I don't want people to think I'm picky and spit in my food. I feel bad when I hang up on telemarketers, and try to do so as politely as possible. I can't say no to those people who sell hand cream at the mall because I don't want to be mean. When someone tells me something is ugly, I won't get it, even if I like it. Is that ridiculous? Does that sound ridiculous? It is ridiculous, and I know it, but I can't stop it.
 

When you are a pushover, you spend a lot of time doing things you don't want to do. Now and then, a little bit if courage rises up, you say no, and then you feel so guilty that you are swallowed up in a sea of yeses again. Being a pushover is not a quality that lends well to making grand speeches, more like angry journal entries.

At some point in my life, I would love to make a grand, "GO STUFF YOURSELF" speech. I think at some point, everyone should get to make the speech that establishes them as the strong, no nonsense, champion of all that is right in the world. The one that makes people stop in their tracks and re-think their position on you. The one that makes them respect you. As a pushover you may be the "go to" or the "nice one" but, are you the respected one? I'm not so sure. I'll keep you posted.

Have you ever gotten to make a mythical grand speech? I would love to hear about it.